diy-test-tube-tutorial

“It…would be the perfect addition to any wedding. The great thing about this DIY is that you can take it home and display it after the wedding!” Keep reading for the full step-by-step.

diy-test-tube-chandelier

diy-test-tube-chandelier-tutorial1
This DIY Test Tube Chandelier would be perfect for over a desert table, or even just in any undecorated nooks around your venue. After you try it out, let us know how you used it!

The full tutorial is below.

Materials:
– 65 Test Tubes (25 for bottom, 40 for top)
– Gold Wire (heavier gauge is preferable)
– Wire Cutters
– Gold Spray Paint
– 12” and 18” Wreath Form

Instructions:
1. Spray paint wreath forms gold and put aside to dry
2. Cut gold wire as follows: Seventy 10” pieces, three 15” pieces and four 25” pieces
3. Take 10” piece of wire and wrap around test tube in an “X” shape, twisting the ends together to form a tight cage for the test tube to rest inside
4. Attach wire to wreath form in a “W” shape
5. Repeat with all test tubes
6. Using the 15” pieces, and with the help of a friend, attach the upper and lower forms together.  Be mindful of wrapping and overlapping to create a sturdy tie
7. Attach the 25″ pieces to the largest piece and anchor on four corners, bringing each wire to center and twisting them around one another to form a cord of wire.  Depending on where the piece will be hung, you may wrap the excess wire into the shape of a circle so it can be hung on a hook.

This tutorial originally appeared on Once Wed’s website – Here is the link. – DIY TEST TUBE CHANDELIER TUTORIAL 

________MojoDawn  5.15.17

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Click here to open the site that offers this bunch (and more!) of geometric and graphic downloads for printing.

Cube Abstract Art

CUBE ABSTRACT ART

Geometric Triangles

GEOMETRIC TRIANGLES

Nautical Symbols

NAUTICAL SYMBOLS

Blue Geometric Triangle Art

BLUE GEOMETRIC TRIANGLE ART

Pink Geometric Heart

PINK GEOMETRIC HEART

Anchor

ANCHOR

Anchor Flower

ANCHOR FLOWER

Sailboat

SAILBOAT

Good Vibes Only

GOOD VIBES ONLY

Gold Foil Anchor

GOLD FOIL ANCHOR

Circle Abstract Art

CIRCLE ABSTRACT ART

Ampersand

AMPERSAND

Poly Butterfly

POLY BUTTERFLY

You're My Main Squeeze

YOU’RE MY MAIN SQUEEZE

Gold Foil Chevron

GOLD FOIL CHEVRON

Blue Watercolor Leaf

BLUE WATERCOLOR LEAF

 

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A great tutorial (that originally appeared on tinybuddha.com) for those of us with anxiety, and anyone who wants a healthy way to navigate stress.  – MojoDawn

The Power of Perspective: A Simple Way to Ease Anxiety

“The primary cause of unhappiness is never the situation but your thoughts about it. Be aware of the thoughts you are thinking.” ~Eckhart Tolle

One of the first ideas I learned in law school was “the reasonable third person,” a legal fiction created to help figure out if someone has acted unreasonably. There’s no clear-cut definition, so I spent a lot of energy arguing what a reasonable person would do. This hypothetical person haunted my law school exams, and later, my career.

But I realized the reasonable third person could teach me something beyond the courtroom. I could apply that perspective to ease anxiety in my own life.

At my law firm, I was so busy that I could barely make meetings in time. It would always be a mad scramble to get everything ready. The senior lawyer would always be annoyed and stressed, and the partner would barely acknowledge my presence.

I’d have too much coffee and be nervous. I’d try to be casual, but I’d either fidget too much or sit too still, trying not to attract attention. I was always so nervous I’d get asked a question and not know what to say.

Mostly, I just sat silently in meetings. Occasionally I’d make a comment, but I’m sure no one noticed because I was so unhelpful. I always felt like an idiot.

Then I realized how personal and subjective my interpretation was. By changing my perspective, I could compose a new, more useful narrative of events. My interpretation—my thinking—could relieve my distress.

I felt like I was always running late, but I made it to meetings, didn’t I? So “I could barely make meetings in time” became “he arrived in time for the meeting to start.”

“I’d always have too much coffee and be nervous” became “Joseph drank coffee.” “I’m sure no one noticed because I was so unhelpful” became “he was pretty quiet during the meeting.”

This narrative removed the self-centered thinking. It focused on what actually happened, not what I felt about what happened.

Afterward, I was less overwhelmed by my thoughts and feelings. I had a broader perspective, like that of a third party. My feelings weren’t bound so tightly to events.

Third Person Thinking

I began to call this third person thinking. It’s the idea of observing your experience from a distance instead of identifying with how you felt about it. I could rise above my own viewpoint of an event.

It’s like the judge deciding whether someone acted like a reasonable person under the circumstances. It’s irrelevant what they subjectively experienced. Focusing on the cold hard facts might overlook the emotional impact of events, but it also allows you to change that emotional impact.

Okay, so this sounds nice in the abstract, but does it actually work? Researchers have examined this skill (called “self-distancing” in the study) in situations that provoke anxiety or anger in real life, like public speaking. The results are encouraging: The studies presented clear improvements from third person thinking.

Benefits

Third person thinking improves your reaction to a stressful event. You’ll feel less pain, anxiety, and “maladaptive post-event processing,” in the unwieldy language of the studies. Post-event processing—your perspective on what happened—improves, becoming more useful.

You’ll also better manage future situations, as you can “appraise future stressors in more challenging and less threatening terms.” Translation: You’ll feel less worried about stuff that usually worries you.

Third person thinking also improves performance during the event itself. Study participants with social anxiety gave better public speaking performances when they engaged in self-distancing. Athletes also perform better when they engage when they manage their self-talk in the same way.

The theory looks good. But are we just fooling ourselves? After all, the objective situation hasn’t changed.

Maybe it seems that way, like trying to convince yourself you’re happy when you feel like crying. But what you think affects how you act and feel. It’s a cycle. Each stage—thoughts, feelings, actions—affects the others.

Thinking Like a Third Person

So, how do you actually do it?

First, consciously observe how you’re talking to yourself. What are you telling yourself—are you saying, “I really screwed that up,” or “I’m sure I sounded like an idiot just then”? Just slowing down like this breaks the automatic chain of reaction, preventing a cascade of emotional reflexes.

Second, write it down. This forces you to slow down even further. It makes the distancing more real, and it’s important to create that muscle memory of practice, just like meditation.

Third, replace personal pronouns like “I” and “me” with third person pronouns in the story you’re telling yourself. Use your name. “I had to give a speech” becomes “Joseph gave a speech” and “she spoke for ten minutes.”

Finally, focus on the events themselves, not the narrative you tell yourself about them. You might be biased to focus on your inner monologue. But try to keep your assessment objective: not “I did a terrible job and I’m about to get fired” but “Her boss told her to redo one section of the assignment.”

Tips

First, make sure you’re being friendly to yourself. Third person thinking isn’t going to do much good if you’re still judging yourself but camouflaging that judgment by changing a few words. Instead, talk to yourself as if you’re talking to a friend who went through the same situation.

At the same time, stay objective. A true friend is supportive but honest; you know your friend will tell you the truth. Being kind, but objective, is the most supportive thing you can do.

Second, third person thinking isn’t about avoidance. Don’t use it to withdraw from how you feel or what you think. You’re still engaging with the event, only from a healthier place.

Finally, just do it. For me, third party thinking felt (very) silly at first. It was also difficult because I was so used to being wrapped up in the events around me.

But just try it out. There’s really nothing to lose, and it just might help you feel calmer and less overpowered by what occurs in your life. It certainly did for me.

About Joseph Castelli

Joseph Castelli practiced mergers and acquisitions in New York City and studied at NYU School of Law. Before that, he taught English in South Korea for three years, hiked and meditated in the Himalayas, and competed in powerlifting competitions. He now writes at Esquire No More.

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Words That Breathe Life Into the Little Girls Around You

girl dollhouse

She is tiny. A little girl learning her role in this world. Language is new and she is figuring out how her behavior affects those around her. How do the words you say to her start to shape her?

When she puts on a new dress, do you fawn over how pretty she looks? When she plays dress-up in mom’s heels, do exclaim she looks beautiful? As she starts figuring out her place in this big scary world, will she learn that her value lies in her beauty?

Or, is there a way to speak to a little girl that does not focus on her looks?

Locus of Control

In psychology, there is the concept of the locus of control. This can be an external or internal locus of control.

A person with an external locus of control believes that things happen to them. Circumstances are outside of your control. Conversely, someone with an internal locus of control believes that they have influence over their circumstances. For example, if someone with an external locus of control is fired, they will blame the economy and their terrible boss. Their lay-off happened to them. However, if someone with an internal locus of control is fired, they will assume it was due to their job performance. Their lay-off was within their control.

It is considered healthier to have an internal locus of control because when things need to be changed, you feel you have the power to initiate that change. When dealing with small children, it is good to empower them as change agents, not just someone who is at the mercy of “whatever life brings.”

If a child does well in school, say something like “you studied very hard for that test and your amazing score was because you worked so hard” rather than “great job with that A! You are so smart.” Being “smart” is something someone feels they are either born with or without. However, taking the time to study hard is something that someone feels they have control over.

little girls

A Young Girl’s Highest Values

“Being beautiful” is something beyond a child’s control, so complimenting a young girl for her appearance doesn’t help to nurture her internal strength. It also feeds into the already intense pressure that society places on girls to primp and crimp themselves into a certain ideal. Chasing the impossible standard to be thinner, taller, blonder, curvier or any other “-er” is a lesson that starts young. There is no need to further enforce this pressure on a girl from the earliest of ages.

What can she be complimented for instead?

– Kindness: When she was kind to her sibling or friend.
– Bravery: When she overcame her fear and tried something for the first time.
– Being a Hard Worker: When she studied hard in school and brought home a good grade.
– Creativity: When she spent time on a creative effort, creating art she was proud of.
– Helpfulness: When she was helpful, perhaps cleaning up her toys on her own initiative.
– Being a Team Player: When she passed the soccer ball on the field, embodying a team player.

It takes a village to raise the next generation up to their most confident and creative potential. It is certainly not easy. However, if we want to help free young girls from pressure related to their appearance, what can we do today to speak confidence into them so that are not trying to find their value in their appearance 10 or 20 years from now?

What was an encouraging word you heard when you were young that’s stayed with you?

Images via All That Is She

Talitha holds an MBA and currently works as a Project Manager for an LA-based social media company McBeard. She has a long history of non-profit work, investing 10 years into organizations like Invisible Children and The Giving Keys. She is a real “get-it-done” kind of gal with a love for yoga, travel, interior design, cats and craft beer.

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